Do your parents or in-laws ignore your kids, their grandchildren? It is frustrating as a mother to watch my girls constantly get disappointed when it comes to my father-in-law.
We are not talking about the occasional, “oh, I didn’t hear you.” We are talking about not even acknowledging them. He was forced by my sister-in-law to come to the hospital the day that the twins were born, and that was only because one of them was not going to make it. After that, he never came back to the hospital, never visited when we brought her home. We still lived in the same state as him at the time.
When Amberly was 3 years old, we got her a Nabi Tablet for her birthday. She was so excited and couldn’t wait until we went to CT to visit him for Christmas so she could show him and tell him all about her new toy. He completely ignored her, didn’t even acknowledge her, and every time she would start talking to him, he would either start talking to someone else or get up and walk away.
The next year, my sister-in-law had her son over the summer. My father-in-law visited with his new grandchild every day. Even purchased most of the baby’s necessities before he was born. When we went to visit for Christmas, we figured that he would at least be happy to see our girls. Boy was I wrong. Once again, Amberly was completely ignored. My oldest daughter, who was at the age of puberty at the time, had a purse with her. All of our purses and coats were placed in my father-in-law’s bedroom. Well his new wife hollered at my oldest daughter for going in there to get her purse. My oldest daughter was also hollered at for gently touching her new cousin’s hand. After dinner was over, my husband went outside with his father to have the after dinner smoke. I immediately put the girls coats, hats, gloves on and packed up Amberly’s toys she had been playing with. As soon as my husband walked back in the house, I said we are leaving right now, and the girls and I walked out to the car while my husband said his goodbyes to his family. I was so furious!
This year I don’t think we are going there. Amberly graduated Kindergarten this past spring. I had messaged my father-in-law in facebook messenger, “Dad, we wanted to let you know that Amberly’s Kindergarten graduation is on Thursday, June 11 at 1:30. She would love for you to come.” I got no response, so a few days later my husband messaged him via text message. He told my husband he had to work. (Now, when you send an invite like that to someone who is married, it is an invite to their spouse as well, why send 2 invites to a couple, right? Apparently wrong.) We found out later, by another family member that he did NOT have to work, he didn’t come because his new wife did not get a separate invite. Amberly was once again left disappointed.
All over his facebook page are photos like this one…
Nothing at all about granddaughters.
It is really sad that he behaves in this manner. He is missing out on getting to know 3 incredible, wonderful granddaughters.